Self Care

 

Self-Worth among Teens: How to raise it & keep it!

 

Do you ever wish you could change something about yourself or your body?

Do you ever feel unhappy with how you look?

Do you ever feel that your self-esteem/Self-worth has taken a toll or you have lost motivation?

 

These I’m sure you will all agree with me are common thoughts that go through the mind of a teen.  Well then, it’s time to rethink and rewire our thoughts…

 

Ayn Rand once said ‘the man who does not value himself cannot value anything or anyone.’ The dictionary defines self-worth as the sense of one’s worth or value as a person.

 

So why is self-worth so important especially amongst teens?

This understanding is critical, especially for teens, for a number of reasons. First, adolescents who think of themselves as valuable are more likely to be willing to try something new, to believe they can be successful and to set goals or have ambitions.

Next, teens that have a sense of their own self-esteem are more likely to stand by their own convictions and beliefs, and not be swayed by others.

Also, adolescents who understand that they have value will more likely be able to handle the disappointments and discouragements that come with growing up.

Kids who know that they are “worth something” are less likely to feel “worthless” when they occasionally fail or suffer a disappointment. When combined with other positive traits like integrity, achievement, motivation or a sense of justice, self-esteem is an important factor in helping adolescents’ grow into productive, successful young adults. Building this sense of self-worth is a lifelong effort, but it is especially important to continue working on it through adolescents – a time when a person may encounter many experiences that could cause him or her to feel self-doubt.

 

So as parents and caregivers how does one build the self-worth of a child?

Parents, adults and caregivers can help teens nurture self-esteem in two basic ways: first, parents can provide unconditional love. At home, with family Unconditional love means being appreciated and valued just for who you are, not for what you do or look like, or what you accomplish. This sense of value for just being “you” is critical.

You can also nurture a teen’s self-esteem by giving opportunities for the teen to experience success. Adolescents who are given responsibility and who are trusted and supported are more likely to succeed. Each successful experience builds on the teen’s sense of competence and mastery – and that makes him and her feel better about themselves!

Self-worth is not something that changes with circumstances. Our sense of self should not be rooted in our performance, the compliments we receive, the good things or the bad things that people will always say, the things we own. Self-worth is unchanging, something that should stay steady. People believe many crazy things; it shouldn’t be so hard to believe in yourself. 

 

Like most things though, this is easier said than done. We tend to base our sense of self-worth on external factors, and studies have shown that this can actually be detrimental to our mental health.

 

While having a sense of accomplishment is important and achievement of goals must be celebrated, it is equally important to realize that there are unique characteristics that make up each one of us, right? And tying our self-worth to what others do and comparing ourselves to other people doesn’t do us any good.

 

A highly developed sense of self-worth has a deep impact on our behaviour, and affects all the choices we make. We no longer feel the need to seek validation from the world around us. You don’t need anyone to tell you the sky is blue, because you know it is. You don’t need anyone to tell you you’re good enough, because you know you are. 

 

Self-worth should never be questioned. Ideally, it should be something that’s intact, no matter what happens. If you don’t have a high level of self-esteem, it’s pretty important to try develop it, and that’s something teens can do.

• Be honest with yourself.
• Figure out your strengths and weaknesses.
• Don’t beat yourself up over your weaknesses.
• Don’t compare yourself to others.
• It’s hard at times, but accept yourself.
• Set realistic goals for yourself.
• Try to get the most out of your strengths and do your best, without demanding unrealistic results of yourself.
• Celebrate your achievements.
• Trust your own feelings.
• Take it one day at a time. Do your best each day.

 

Even on days when you mess up, on days when someone’s done better than you, on days when you’re tired of trying when nothing works out, on days when someone says something unkind or no one’s there to cheer you on, your sense of self-worth should be unshakable. Because everyone falls down from time to time, so be kind to yourself about it. And believe in yourself enough to know when you can try again, to know when to rest, to know that no matter what, you are worthy, and you deserve the best life you can live!